I am the product
Of the good
and the bad

I am the product
Of events and the
response my personality spawns

No matter what happened
Or what will come to pass,
I am a light in this world

I am the strongest version
of myself now
and I will be stronger tomorrow

And my light will shine brighter
until I am just as luminous
as a full moon

I am who I am.
My mind is mine.
and this heart burns
For my aspirations.

I have been lost for
a while, but now I
See where I struggle-
Leaving my life in

Someone else's hands.

Feeling hopeless, they
like to take advantage
of my downslides-
so that I only hear the negative.

I know I'm fucked up!

But now I feel a fire.
I am not as weak as I 
may have seemed
before.

And I am braver
than you could know.
I have already faced a war-
so how could life make a

Victim out of me.

I'm done with the influencers,
Of these downhill moods.
And I'm done saying that
there is nothing I can do.

Cause I am still standing here
after every time I thought that
Life would break me-
or that my body would fail me.

I am not perfect
But I am damn well near it!
Because there is no blueprint
For who I should be in comparison.

No matter what it is
that comes my way,
No matter what ailment
Fights me,

No matter how many
Fucking words I yell
at myself in hate,
I will turn it into

Something better.

For I am the fighter.
I am the warrior-
I am the goddess of
My talents!

So don't think you
can Undermine me,
Critique me,
or look at me like

I'm the plague.

Cause I sure as hell
have been through worse-
and I was born to fight
Bigger battles than

The ones questioning my worth.

I am not taking that shit anymore.

So the little girl who only
watched as her father yelled-
And the girl who cried when alone,

The little girl who couldn't
defend herself against the
Bullies' words or hits,

The one who preferred to
give up and pretend, in a fantasy,
that she was a warrior...

She is now my ward.

I am the protector of her
Dreams and her heart
Broken a thousand times over.

the Sorceress, the Queen,
the Renegade Revolutionary,
and the World Changer,
are finally on the surface...

and there is no way
I'll stop, now that I
Realize I am the one
Who can never be silent.
________________________________________

Hey all! I have been going through a lot lately, and it's been taking quite a toll on my mental health. However, today I got hit by a wave of empowerment. It will take some time, but I don't want to think ill of myself anymore. I am the way I am and anyone who has an issue with that can go fuck themselves. I may not know what makes people give me weird looks or why some people hate me on sight but I decided it really doesn't matter to me anymore. I'm tired of being sad and unmotivated to do anything. I'm tired of thinking that there is no way I can change what's happening to me. I am tired of questioning what I'm worth because, really, I'm worth a lot more with each day that I'm alive. I may not be able to completely control my health and I may not always get an A (that part was hard to type being the perfectionist i am but the fact I typed it is progress) but I can either beat myself up about it or move on. Just like I can either let my past haunt me or make my peace, recognize the mistakes, and move forward wiser than before. And I definitely have a mind of my own and a voice to go with it and they are a lot stronger than I have made them out to be for a while.

Also, I am thinking that I might start a Youtube Channel soon. I think I'll start by making videos in which I read the poems aloud and go from there. Still thinking through the pros and cons of it but I will let you know what I decide.

Anyway, I hope that you are all doing well! Have a magical week!

These are the paths
That lay in front of me-
All of them chosen
By many who came
Before me.

Which can I choose?
Which one can I live
with, even when I
face failure and
discourse?

Which can I be
happy with, and
have few regrets
that I decided to
have my life like that?

I've been walking one
path for so long.
I jumped across to another,
promising I would return when
I learned what I wanted to.

But now I find myself
Confused about where I am.
Did I make the wrong choice?
Am I not as capable as I thought-
Or is all this walking, tiring me out?

Where did my motivation go?
Where did my authority leave me?
When did I become the woman
who stopped deciding where I
want to be?

This stranger who walks on the
path so many others picked with
passions in their hearts,
but only settlement in mine,
as if I ran out of options.

When did the rain come
and douse my ambition?
Who am I anymore?
________________________________________

     Hey everyone! I know this is a bit late but this semester is already crazy.

     Often times in one's life, one questions their choices and if the direction they are heading in is really where they want to go, commonly referred to as a "midlife crisis". Last semester was tough for me and I still find myself exhausted from everything that happened. It's made getting into the swing of things for this semester especially difficult. However, it also kind of feels like I was thrown into something that everyone else got a tutorial for and I skipped through some lack of attention.

     In addition, this is the semester in which I have to pick a major. I didn't think anything would change so I decided to stop working on multiple tracks for a fall back and picked what I thought I would like the most. While I do have an interest in the subject I'm studying, something feels off about this semester and I don't know if it's the fact that this isn't the field for me or if it's just a hard point that I need to push through.

     At any rate, it feels as if I've woken up in someone else's life...and I hate it. Am I putting practicality above what I truly want? Am I focusing on something more than I should be? I have no idea.

     I hope everything is going well with all of you! Until next time!